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That's a good question. Did I change? I'm sure everyone have in some points in their life. I'll tell you many points in my life that changed me.
Back in the day in 2010, I was playing this game WOW (World of Warcraft) I was playing it so much same time as I visit with friends, neighbors, and family. I didn't feel much different, it felt like mediocre. But I'm missing something. One day, I first heard that song, I can only Imagine. WOW!! What a powerful message that made me feel. I started to think....if I go to Heaven would I dance and sing or am I dreading that day that I meet Him? During that time playing the game....I started getting verses that the Holy Spirit brought to my mind. Redeeming the time because the days are evil and when I stand before God, what works have I done for Him that when my works goes through the fire will it get through or will it melted away? I started to cry. I wanted to give myself over to God for Him to use me. I told God I wanted my life to be blessings to others, glorify Him and bring others to Him. So God started to talk to me about going on the mission trip Nicaragua that my church in Fulton NY was doing at the time. At first I was scared to go and making up excuses that I can't go, like my hearing aids won't work if it's wet with sweats all the time or that I won't understand the people's language, I may get sick what was over there. But I kept feeling God's conviction that He wants me to go. I finally went. I'm so glad I did. I LOVES it! What I loves best about it, is people. They're grateful for us to serve them. Providing them, foods, shoes, medicines, and building better shack for them. Going on that mission trip open my eyes to things that third world country people don't have compare to what I have. It broke my heart. They don't have beds, no bath or shower, no foods, no blanket to keep them warm. Each shack we go to, we will ask what they need and we bring the next day. Then we share the Gospel with them. Some of us on our teams don't know Spanish well so we have a translator with us. Amazing how the interaction between our team to translator to the person we're talking to. While we were waiting for our next flight to back home. My team leader's wife asked me will I go again if I was given another chance to go. I immediately answered, "YES!" When we got back home....2 days after being home...I was feeling overwhelmed with all the things I have and I just want to get rid of it because I feel like I have too much stuff. My team leader's wife texted me and asked how am I doing. She told me that she wanted to make sure I'm doing okay because she have also experienced that herself on her first mission trip. Not only people that I love to help, but with being with my team and praying together is such a powerful thing! Being on the mission teams create such a bond that no one else can understand. I read every prayers spoken....many of them is prayers for the people around us, our teams. It's so uplifting to hear it. I got to really hear my pastor's heart for our church family for the first time. It made me cry realizing how big of a heart that my pastor have for our church family. God have also been working on my heart during that time. Being in the mission trip make God feel so much closer.
Year 2012; God continue to work on my heart and I made the decision to quit the game WOW (World of Warcraft). because I realized I wanted to do more with my life then there is always about the game. With that choice made....I went on to another mission trip in 2013 because I felt God calling me to the mission again. It was a HUGE blessing! God had tested me by having me sell the 2 items that I would hold on to, but when He asked me to sell it in the auction to raise money for the trip, I did it and because I did that....God blessed me by having the money raised more then what they're worth in the market. Only youth pastor Dave and I went on the mission trip again, while other 5 friends are new to it. Mission trip was to Grenada. People there speak English, many are African Black. We help the church with VBS for the children in one of the many churches there. What make my heart very sad is; there is not many fathers/husbands in the home. Many are just women and children.
Year 2013; the last year of my job. I've been feeling the need for change. I met my friend/mentor, Mary Carter through my sister in love. Mary. I've been wanting to move to another place, but my sister in love, (bless her heart) doesn't want me to move because I was the only Aunt living nearby for her children to see and interact with. During that year......I was having a really bad time at work. I even try to make things better for co worker and I to work better, but he continue to make it worse. One point beginning of the year he said something that tore my heart out about me, my personality. Just made it miserable for me to work there. I told God, I can't do this anymore. Please get me another job. I forgave my co-worker for treating me unkindly. My friend Mary Carter have offer a job for me but it's going to be in FL. I didn't know if I will be happy if I moved so far away from my family and friends that I have known for so long and move to a place that I know no one. God told me He is still with me and that when I follow His leading many blessings will follow.
Year 2014; I turned in my noticed that I am quitting the job that I work for 12 years and I love that place because of the people. But I know God is calling me to a better place that I'm placing my trust in Him to move across states to the panhandle of FL. Since I moved to FL I was really happy. I was sad for my family to not being able to visit but at the same time, I knew I'm right where God wanted me and I'm content with that. Being under the influence of my friend/mentor/boss, she have taught me a lot that help me grow more in skills, pushing me to go out of my comfort zone. I went to Dani Johnson's conference and a lot of what she teaches really help me to understand myself more and other people better and their personalities. Being away from family and friends help me to mature more and pushes me out of my comfort zone more. Stayed with the family for almost 2 years as a nanny and help manages the household and being overnight stays with the kids while parents are away. I got to do many travels with them and it is so much fun! So many experiences and learning a lot of things I didn't know before.
Year 2016; While visiting my grandparents that summer for 1 week, I felt right at peace being there. That's where I knew that God wanted me to move to ID. The family I worked with moved to CA. I moved and got to ID just in time before big snowstorms arrived in Dec. As I understand it is the first time in a long time it happened that it snowed that much. Dec-Jan, I didn't have a job......I just felt that peace from God, telling me to not worry and just trust in Him, rest 2 months without searching for a job. Then in February of 2017 I saw a job, I felt a sense of peace about it. I applied for the job and then I was hired. Been with the same job for a year and 2 months now. I loves it! During that time I stayed with my grandparents, while searching to find apartment to live closer, but felt God telling me to wait to search for apartment so I waited. Because of living in the mountains it's tough getting together with friends for fun. So I started playing the game WOW (World of Warcraft) in March mostly for friends interaction and grouping with friends for fun. Then in November...I was told about this tiny house, so I investigated about the house and my friend who is now a roommate we talked about it and we decided it's a good place to start. So we moved in Dec just before the New Year of 2018. haha My mom and I been praying for the apartment for me to move into, even with a roommate and God provide that 11 months later. Crazy thing is about my roommate.....God had told me that Ashley will be my roommate when I started to pray for a roommate but at the time I didn't know because she was still with her ex at the time. Playing with WOW have been fun during that time. I also got to the point that I'm getting way too much into it, that God talk to me about not playing the game WOW and focus on what He wants me to do.
I've been thinking on what God want me to do. To bring Him glory. To make my life a living sacrifice. While I'm thinking and praying of what He wants me to do. I saw a post a friend posted from Wild at Heart...."Don't ask yourself what the world needs, ask yourself what makes you come alive....." that first paragraph, stands out to me. It got me to thinking...and first thing that came up to my mind is mission trip. I don't know if it's mission trip to another country or missions in the area where I am. But I'm gonna keep listening for God's guidance for my life.
So question is.....did I change? In many ways I have. Many places I've seen God's works on my life and still is. I'm not perfect and never will be. I still make mistakes even when I don't like it but I know that with the mistakes it's a reminder that God still uses me and with mistakes I can share with others the wisdom I've learned. I'm glad I had changed.....if I hadn't then I would still be in the same boring mediocre life not being a shining light for Jesus and doing things that will help others. I may be an answer to someone's prayer. Just never know where God will place me right where I am now. So here to more changes in the future and looking forward to it. That amazing life changes and the works I do for Jesus can truly express what I feel now when I see Jesus.....I would dance and sing for you Jesus, I can only Imagine! Now I can't wait to see this movie tonight! God bless you on your journey, readers. Here's the music video and just close your eyes and listen to the lyrics, let it wash over you.
Back in the day in 2010, I was playing this game WOW (World of Warcraft) I was playing it so much same time as I visit with friends, neighbors, and family. I didn't feel much different, it felt like mediocre. But I'm missing something. One day, I first heard that song, I can only Imagine. WOW!! What a powerful message that made me feel. I started to think....if I go to Heaven would I dance and sing or am I dreading that day that I meet Him? During that time playing the game....I started getting verses that the Holy Spirit brought to my mind. Redeeming the time because the days are evil and when I stand before God, what works have I done for Him that when my works goes through the fire will it get through or will it melted away? I started to cry. I wanted to give myself over to God for Him to use me. I told God I wanted my life to be blessings to others, glorify Him and bring others to Him. So God started to talk to me about going on the mission trip Nicaragua that my church in Fulton NY was doing at the time. At first I was scared to go and making up excuses that I can't go, like my hearing aids won't work if it's wet with sweats all the time or that I won't understand the people's language, I may get sick what was over there. But I kept feeling God's conviction that He wants me to go. I finally went. I'm so glad I did. I LOVES it! What I loves best about it, is people. They're grateful for us to serve them. Providing them, foods, shoes, medicines, and building better shack for them. Going on that mission trip open my eyes to things that third world country people don't have compare to what I have. It broke my heart. They don't have beds, no bath or shower, no foods, no blanket to keep them warm. Each shack we go to, we will ask what they need and we bring the next day. Then we share the Gospel with them. Some of us on our teams don't know Spanish well so we have a translator with us. Amazing how the interaction between our team to translator to the person we're talking to. While we were waiting for our next flight to back home. My team leader's wife asked me will I go again if I was given another chance to go. I immediately answered, "YES!" When we got back home....2 days after being home...I was feeling overwhelmed with all the things I have and I just want to get rid of it because I feel like I have too much stuff. My team leader's wife texted me and asked how am I doing. She told me that she wanted to make sure I'm doing okay because she have also experienced that herself on her first mission trip. Not only people that I love to help, but with being with my team and praying together is such a powerful thing! Being on the mission teams create such a bond that no one else can understand. I read every prayers spoken....many of them is prayers for the people around us, our teams. It's so uplifting to hear it. I got to really hear my pastor's heart for our church family for the first time. It made me cry realizing how big of a heart that my pastor have for our church family. God have also been working on my heart during that time. Being in the mission trip make God feel so much closer.
Year 2012; God continue to work on my heart and I made the decision to quit the game WOW (World of Warcraft). because I realized I wanted to do more with my life then there is always about the game. With that choice made....I went on to another mission trip in 2013 because I felt God calling me to the mission again. It was a HUGE blessing! God had tested me by having me sell the 2 items that I would hold on to, but when He asked me to sell it in the auction to raise money for the trip, I did it and because I did that....God blessed me by having the money raised more then what they're worth in the market. Only youth pastor Dave and I went on the mission trip again, while other 5 friends are new to it. Mission trip was to Grenada. People there speak English, many are African Black. We help the church with VBS for the children in one of the many churches there. What make my heart very sad is; there is not many fathers/husbands in the home. Many are just women and children.
Year 2013; the last year of my job. I've been feeling the need for change. I met my friend/mentor, Mary Carter through my sister in love. Mary. I've been wanting to move to another place, but my sister in love, (bless her heart) doesn't want me to move because I was the only Aunt living nearby for her children to see and interact with. During that year......I was having a really bad time at work. I even try to make things better for co worker and I to work better, but he continue to make it worse. One point beginning of the year he said something that tore my heart out about me, my personality. Just made it miserable for me to work there. I told God, I can't do this anymore. Please get me another job. I forgave my co-worker for treating me unkindly. My friend Mary Carter have offer a job for me but it's going to be in FL. I didn't know if I will be happy if I moved so far away from my family and friends that I have known for so long and move to a place that I know no one. God told me He is still with me and that when I follow His leading many blessings will follow.
Year 2014; I turned in my noticed that I am quitting the job that I work for 12 years and I love that place because of the people. But I know God is calling me to a better place that I'm placing my trust in Him to move across states to the panhandle of FL. Since I moved to FL I was really happy. I was sad for my family to not being able to visit but at the same time, I knew I'm right where God wanted me and I'm content with that. Being under the influence of my friend/mentor/boss, she have taught me a lot that help me grow more in skills, pushing me to go out of my comfort zone. I went to Dani Johnson's conference and a lot of what she teaches really help me to understand myself more and other people better and their personalities. Being away from family and friends help me to mature more and pushes me out of my comfort zone more. Stayed with the family for almost 2 years as a nanny and help manages the household and being overnight stays with the kids while parents are away. I got to do many travels with them and it is so much fun! So many experiences and learning a lot of things I didn't know before.
Year 2016; While visiting my grandparents that summer for 1 week, I felt right at peace being there. That's where I knew that God wanted me to move to ID. The family I worked with moved to CA. I moved and got to ID just in time before big snowstorms arrived in Dec. As I understand it is the first time in a long time it happened that it snowed that much. Dec-Jan, I didn't have a job......I just felt that peace from God, telling me to not worry and just trust in Him, rest 2 months without searching for a job. Then in February of 2017 I saw a job, I felt a sense of peace about it. I applied for the job and then I was hired. Been with the same job for a year and 2 months now. I loves it! During that time I stayed with my grandparents, while searching to find apartment to live closer, but felt God telling me to wait to search for apartment so I waited. Because of living in the mountains it's tough getting together with friends for fun. So I started playing the game WOW (World of Warcraft) in March mostly for friends interaction and grouping with friends for fun. Then in November...I was told about this tiny house, so I investigated about the house and my friend who is now a roommate we talked about it and we decided it's a good place to start. So we moved in Dec just before the New Year of 2018. haha My mom and I been praying for the apartment for me to move into, even with a roommate and God provide that 11 months later. Crazy thing is about my roommate.....God had told me that Ashley will be my roommate when I started to pray for a roommate but at the time I didn't know because she was still with her ex at the time. Playing with WOW have been fun during that time. I also got to the point that I'm getting way too much into it, that God talk to me about not playing the game WOW and focus on what He wants me to do.
I've been thinking on what God want me to do. To bring Him glory. To make my life a living sacrifice. While I'm thinking and praying of what He wants me to do. I saw a post a friend posted from Wild at Heart...."Don't ask yourself what the world needs, ask yourself what makes you come alive....." that first paragraph, stands out to me. It got me to thinking...and first thing that came up to my mind is mission trip. I don't know if it's mission trip to another country or missions in the area where I am. But I'm gonna keep listening for God's guidance for my life.
So question is.....did I change? In many ways I have. Many places I've seen God's works on my life and still is. I'm not perfect and never will be. I still make mistakes even when I don't like it but I know that with the mistakes it's a reminder that God still uses me and with mistakes I can share with others the wisdom I've learned. I'm glad I had changed.....if I hadn't then I would still be in the same boring mediocre life not being a shining light for Jesus and doing things that will help others. I may be an answer to someone's prayer. Just never know where God will place me right where I am now. So here to more changes in the future and looking forward to it. That amazing life changes and the works I do for Jesus can truly express what I feel now when I see Jesus.....I would dance and sing for you Jesus, I can only Imagine! Now I can't wait to see this movie tonight! God bless you on your journey, readers. Here's the music video and just close your eyes and listen to the lyrics, let it wash over you.
